The curse the alpha women.
Instead of the man building and gathering resources needed to have a debt free family, he spends all of them to make her happy. Buying flowers, gifts, excessive material goods (clothes) and play things. This is how she throws herself into poverty and debt. He’s such a nice husband and serves her with all his heart. He’s trying so hard to please her but, the more he does, the more she suffocates. You can’t do much on little oxygen. The kids and cleaning become too much. Then there are the financial problems that they fight about because she sucks everything from him in her desperate attempt to fill the emptiness inside. No matter how much he does stuff for her, the more unhappy she is and the more they argue. Then she feels she needs to work because she is drowning and suffocating at home from all the pressure she feels from the beta husband, kids and lack of money. She ends up not wanting more kids or aborts them. She refuses to have sex with him. All this is an attempt to “save” her marriage (herself). Either they live this way emotionally divorced. Or she gets a real divorce. She tells all her friends that marriage is a sham.
Happy wife happy life leaves her to wonder how to make him a man !! Why does he disgust her? What am I suppose to do? She doesn’t know how to get PEACE!!
Her real purpose is to serve HIM! She earns all the things she could ever desire by submitting to his desires, building his goals and dreams. Happy husband, happy wife. This is WHERE she finds PEACE. NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND.
The husband is the head of the wife, Period! – Pat Robertson
3 3/4 YEARS OF MY MARRIED LIFE I WAS EXPERIENCING THIS suffocation feeling, emptiness and restlessness. I maintained control compared to what I experienced growing up and the other women around me. Because I’m SUPER ANTI-DIVORCE and ANTI-CONTENTION. We never fought or argued but, i felt i was constantly disappointed in him. Every time he said that he was going to DO IT (create business momentum) I never believed him. I was starting to lose faith in his capacity to provide, protect and lead our family. I was turned off to wanting sex or rocking it in the bedroom. I never worked out of the home or put my kids in barnehage. But, it’s was soooooo tempting! Not anymore!!!! I would rather die than do that!
I was the one controlling him! And the more I controlled his time the less he spent on our business. My un-submission was me wanting my husband to spend time with me all the time because i thought that that was the problem in my parents 2 divorces. It was also me buying the things that were practical and expensive for my sanity, to keep the house clean and in order. Because i had so little capacity, i was striving so hard to do less and clean less in the home.
These last 2 months EVERYTHING HAS CHANGED; Once we started applying our selves in our proper roles. This is the only time that we have disagreed or have had heated discussions; as we got out of our comfort zone and adopted new behaviors. Letting go of what doesn’t work and grabbing hold of what lasts forever.
IT GOT WORSE BEFORE IT GOT BETTER.
NOW IT CONTINUES TO FOLLOW THE EXPONENTIAL GROWTH CURVE. I have greater capacity and emotional stability. He now has control over himself for the business and our financial freedom.
A confident husband is a happy husband. A confident husband is a man with a wife who desires him sexually and obsesses about having sex with him every day.